Category: Rockstar Awesomesauce

self love, personal growth
Rockstar Awesomesauce

Becoming A Fire-Walker

Personal growth can be somewhat tricky. In order to grow, we have to take a hard look at old perspectives and beliefs about yourself that are no longer working for you and change them. Getting to the root of these beliefs can be painful and unpleasant. We have to walk through fire before you can rise from the ashes.

Becoming A Fire-Walker

Recently, I had the privilege and honor of volunteering at a Tony Robbins event called Unleash the Power Within. A 3 ½ day seminar that helps attendees unlock and unleash the forces inside them to break through limitations and take control of your life. It is life-changing! If you have not attended and are not living the life you want…I highly recommend it.

My first introduction to Tony Robbins was in 2016. My partner-in-self-love, Amy Carpentieri was attending UPW (Unleash the Power Within) in Dallas. She asked me if I wanted to attend with her. I had read Awaken the Giant Within and have a natural thirst for personal growth, but what made me say “Yes” was the title…Unleash the Power Within…YES! I want that!

I had no idea what I was getting myself into and how my life would be propelled forward. As I previously mentioned,  my childhood and development years were pretty much stagnant. With a mother suffering from an undiagnosed mental illness, I was ignored and abandoned. My mom would not begin to get the right help until I was a sophomore in High School. The only thing worse than an ignored child is an abused child. I endured both.

When I was 19 years old, I read a magazine article titled, “30 Things to Do by the Age of 30.” One item on the list was “forgive your parents.” It said, “You are now an adult, take accountability for your actions. Your parents did their best they could with what they know.” (As a parent myself, this is very true). So…after reading the article, I forgave my mom. Unbeknownst to me, I still carried the pain. Can any of you relate? I would go on to make terrible decisions with dreadful, self-sabotaging results.

UPW showed the way to release this pain and begin to become the Self Love Rockstar I want to be (and have always been inside), and to live the life I want and deserve on my terms. I have overcome fears, gained self-confidence, and self-worth. Priceless!

When volunteering at UPW, you are given the opportunity to help others go through this transformative process. There are not many things in life that are more gratifying than helping others improve and change their lives. (This is also the reason Amy and I write, market, and share our experiences with you, Rockstars!)

Applying What We’ve Learned into Daily Life

It has only been a few weeks since volunteering at UPW, but I have agreed to speak at a professional conference before 200 attendees, asked for a pay raise, and shared my own vulnerabilities with you. I would have never have attempted these things that are propelling me both professionally and personally had I not attended UPW, and done the work on myself.

I am not perfect, and no better than you are. Anyone can make changes to live their best life. Learning and growing are what make us Human. If you are unhappy or even just living humdrum life, make a change! Live your life with Passion, and pursue the things that you love and bring you joy.

Life is too short to be scared and not take risks. I’d rather be the person that’s like, ‘I messed up,’ than, ‘I wish I did that.’ Justine Skye – Singer Songwriter

This weeks challenge, Rockstars: Find one thing you have wanted to change for awhile and make a plan to change it today or in the next week. Tell us about your experience, what it is and how this change has impacted your life. Giddy Up!

Self Love, Personal Growth
Rockstar Awesomesauce

Self Love, Hypnosis, Divorce, and Financial Abundance

Sooo… if you are like I was in the past then you’ve heard about hypnosis either in movies (like “Now You See Me” or “Shallow Hal”), or you have heard about people using hypnosis to lose weight or quit smoking. Recently I have learned about a whole different kind of hypnosis called “hypnotherapy.”

I know that Self Love Rockstars love the path of least resistance. We always ask, “What is the easiest and most ‘in the flow’ way to feel good, love ourselves, and to thrive?” We talk about changing our state, moving our bodies, immersing ourselves in workshops, listening to music with subliminal messages, and now we are adding hypnotherapy.

At SLR, we are all about exploring these tools together, and I had a profound hypnotherapy session recently. The idea of “getting out of my head” and going under the surface to the subconscious has always been appealing to me. So many of us are stuck “in our head” and have a challenging time getting to the emotions, or “root” of issues so they can heal. Using the subconscious can be a great solution.

Stuck in a Past Experience?

What I didn’t realize before is that beliefs and experiences from the past (sometimes really way, way past) can keep us “stuck” now all these years later, in a revolving, repeating pattern. This was the revelation from the session I had last week. Here is what happened.

I was working on the issue of financial abundance and we had identified some beliefs and feelings I had about money in a previous session. During this session we went over the beliefs and feelings about money after I was hypnotized and I surprisingly regressed to the moment where I was around 5 and my dad sat me in the room and told me he and my mom were getting a divorce. I started crying and feeling super emotional in the session. I was not counting on that at all!

Divorce and Financial Abundance

I didn’t realize there was a connection with financial abundance and my parents getting divorced, but it was there with younger me. She was crying and apologizing for asking him and my mom to buy the bigger house and feeling like it was her fault they were getting a divorce because of all the fighting about money. All these years later and these beliefs were hanging out in my subconscious and affecting my abundance?!? What else is hanging out there?

The practitioner went on to review the previous list of beliefs one at a time, replacing each negative belief with a positive one- having adult me guide the 5 year old the truth vs. the belief and confirming she believed it. This process felt amazing- like I was being stitched together one healing light band aid at a time. It was beautiful how much light I felt- and then she asked the adult me if there was anything else i wanted to share with 5 yr old me- I shared many beads of wisdom- about our brilliance and gifts, about how loved and whole we are, and about setting boundaries and respecting ourselves, and about connection and being whole. It was so beautiful and deep.

Being hypnotized was amazing… i was totally aware of what was happening, but I knew I was hypnotized by the responsiveness evaluations she did- it is truly amazing. Now I am integrating and feeling my way around. I am so grateful and happy to let go of beliefs to have been carrying around for FORTY years!

I definitely went out of my comfort zone using hypnotherapy, and I’m so glad I did. The challenge for all of you Rockstars is to try a form of healing you haven’t explored before and really go for it! Giddy Up Rockstars!

self love, personal growth
Rockstar Awesomesauce

Blame for the Bad AND the Good Like a Rockstar

I live in South Florida. We just endured Hurricane Irma and our family was very, very fortunate. For the week leading up to the actual hurricane, I avoided listening to any commentary and just checked the map for updates really often. Otherwise I would not have felt very rockstar-like. I would have felt more like an anxiety freak. Sometimes looking at the projected path was scarier, but I knew that if I listened to any newscaster they were going to dramatize every situation even more.

What ended up happening is that many family members ended up staying in our home (19 of us to be exact- 22 if you count pets). Well, to be really accurate, we saw a frog hiding in the shutters after the storm so technically there were 23 of us. All things considered we actually had a really great time together, and everyone stayed out of everyone else’s way amazingly. We all cooked, cleaned, and played lots and lots of cards and games. The kids made forts. If it wasn’t for the hurricane I would have called it a vacation. As I said we were very, very fortunate.

Afterwards, as we clean up whatever messes the storm made, and patiently (and sometimes not so patiently) wait for all the hard working people to get power and cable back on for everyone, I’m reminded of a teaching Tony Robbins gives about blame. I know that many people that have lost everything in this storm (as well as from Hurricane Harvey). They may want to blame someone, something, or God. Tony shares that if we are going to blame for the bad stuff,  we also need to blame for the good things that arise out of those experiences.  (warning explicit)  

The reminder to blame for both the bad AND the good is so important, especially when things feel like they really “suck.” For example, I got to know some family members in a way I never would have without the hurricane. Being in a confined space for a longer period of time enabled way more bonding and connection than we’ve had before. We also all had an opportunity to contribute afterwards and help our family and neighbors to rebuild. The list of “the good stuff” goes on and on.

I still feel tender about the experience… and scared with other storms looming as I write this. At the same time though, I am grateful for the blessings that come from the struggle.

The challenge for you rockstars is to think of something in your past where you have been blaming others (or even yourself) and then find at least one good thing to “blame” for as well. Giddy up rockstars!

lasting change
Rockstar Awesomesauce

How to Create Lasting Change for Self Love Rockstars

Have you ever thought something like, “I should quit smoking,” or “I should go to the gym,” or, “I should take better care of myself,” and then not changed a thing? Sure, we all have. Things stay the same and we feel bad about not making the changes we know we “should” make. We can create lasting change by turning shoulds into musts.

Create Lasting Change

The first time I went to Tony Robbin’s seminar, Unleash the Power Within, I was riveted. I learned so much, even though many of the concepts and teachings I already “knew” intuitively on some level. One such teaching was about “turning shoulds into musts.” The jest of it is that change doesn’t happen until something we know we “should” do becomes something we know we “must” do. To see a brief clip from Tony directly teaching about this, Turn Ordinary into Extraordinary

I reflected on what “shoulds” I had turned into “musts” up to that point in my life. One example of something that had become a must for me and my family was eating mostly healthy and organic foods. I had been learning how to cook and what foods were good to prepare, etc. at the time. The more I learned, the more I realized how important it was to feed my family and self the healthiest options possible. Meaning, if I were going to make a birthday cake, I was going to use organic sugar… things like that.

There were many other shoulds that had not become musts, however. I was not in the shape I wanted to be in. I had very little energy a lot of the time. I was not following my dreams or living as passionately as I wanted.

Then came Unleash the Power Within. I felt propelled to a new level and created new “musts” for myself. I have never looked back. One must for me was to have more energy and be in better shape. Without energy we can’t be passionate or reach our goals effectively. I joined a gym within days of getting back from the seminar and have never worked out less than 3 days a week since. In fact, I regularly enjoy working out 6 days- going because I want to! I literally look at the workout classes and plan my schedule around when I’m going to the gym! That would never have happened a few years ago. I would never have woken up at 5 am to exercise. What? No way! But something happened inside me- I connected enough emotionally to what I wanted and why, and realized that in this one area (health), this was now non-negotiable. This was no longer a “should.”

Now, to be fair, there are other areas in my life where I still have “shoulds” that I’m working on committing as “musts.” I would like to take more daily action career-wise. I feel I “should” be writing at least once a day instead of twice per week. I realize that until I connect enough dots emotionally to what I want and why, it will remain a “should.” As of today I am committing to write every single day. I am turning this “should” into a “must.”

Who is with me?

Who has at least one “should” they would like to change to a “must” right NOW? Let’s do this together. The challenge for this week rockstars is to change one should into a must. This can be as small as committing to look at yourself in the mirror once a day and smiling at yourself or saying “You Rock!” at yourself, or as big as making a health or work change. Let’s do this rockstars!

self love, personal growth
Rockstar Awesomesauce

Rockstars Don’t Have to Figure it Out

In adult life, we all have to “figure it out.” We need to figure out how to pay bills, get a loan for a home, and if you are a parent, how to keep another human being alive and thriving.

This practice of “figuring it out” has strengthened the rockstar in me but has also hindered me at times, too. Recently, my husband and I have been set back 10 years financially. So, in true” figure it out” fashion, I leap into action. We come up with a plan. I research and research, analyze and reanalyze…to the point of having trouble turning it off at the end of the day to sleep.

During my first bout of restlessness (3 nights or so)…I cannot “figure it out.” I research and research, analyze and reanalyze, and I still cannot “figure it out.” I begin feeling gloomy, mad, and frustrated…probably due to lack of sleep 😉 So, I set it aside.

But, I Cannot Let it Go

I have to make something happen. I have to figure it out. So, again the following night, I research and research, analyze and reanalyze, and still I cannot figure it out. I feel a myriad of emotions. The betrayal of been taken advantage of. The sadness and loss of the money. The raw anger.  The frustration of still no conclusion.

Let Go and Let Change Happen

Then, at 3’oclock am…through the myriad of emotions…a breakthrough! The serenity prayer comes to me. You know it…

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference.”

I cannot change the fact that the money is gone. The only thing I can do is to let it go, and be grateful. I know, sounds ridiculous. Grateful? WTF?! Grateful for what? I get to start over?

Yes. And, I am grateful. There is a solution. We will use the equity we have built in our home over the last 10 years to get us out of debt. We have the opportunity to start over. We are wiser. We are stronger. And, in my experience, in tough times likes these…what’s behind the next door is better than we could have ever imagined. We are guided. Find the good in difficult terrain, and be grateful for it. Embrace change.  And, never give up!

This week’s challenge Rockstars: Let’s get real and raw with ourselves. What are you “figuring out?” Then practice letting go and letting change happen. Take time each day to be grateful (even if it is just 5 minutes). After the week is over, share your experience with us. Do you feel relief? How is this simple exercise changing your life? Giddy up!

Giving and Receiving

I had an amazing opportunity to volunteer or “crew” at a recent Tony Robbins event, Unleash the Power Within. The experience was profound in many ways.

First of all, I didn’t know anyone there. I got to step out of my comfort zone and just show up with almost 600 other strangers (to me) that wanted to help support the attendees of the event. Instead of planning and controlling everything, my motto for those 5 days was to “be flexible.” what a refreshing experience!

When I got there we were waiting to find out which entrance we were allowed in due to security. We walked from one end of the building to another. I laughed about it. Was going with the flow. I got to meet several people while we walked. It was actually fun. From one activity to another, we all went with the flow, going with what was needed and what would happen next.

I wasn’t sure what it would feel like to give so fully of myself for several days. IT WAS AMAZING! I was able to take care of my own needs just fine and had plenty overflowing to give. My energy was high, and really loved smiling at others and helping with whatever they needed. Much of the time I simply walked around answered any questions asked of me, handing out items when needed and things like that. Small, simple acts of giving. Giving love essentially. For the first time, I didn’t think, “What about me?” at all and that was really refreshing and fulfilling.

I know there are others out there that have the opposite pattern of giving so much they are depleted, but for me this was perfect. Being able to serve others and be spontaneous actually was giving ot myself in the end.

self love, personal growth
Rockstar Awesomesauce, Self Love Books

Believe in Yourself: #GirlBoss Book Review

It blows my mind how so many of us knock ourselves down regardless of successes achieved. I just read #GirlBoss with Sophia Amoruso and even she is talking about not believing in herself while running a $100 million plus company. She finally had enough, and basically stepped in and stopped the negative story playing in her head.

How many of you have felt not good enough… like you were faking your way through something? A job? A social event? For years I carried around that voice, “If they only really knew me they wouldn’t like me.” WTF! Why not? We all have amazing gifts to share and have a right to be here on this planet. Time to take up some space rockstars!

Here is our review of #GirlBoss:

This book is awesome… Sophia is raw and authentic in every way. It’s amazing to hear her story and learn from her evolution to self love and acceptance. The fact that she actually shares things in her past (like shoplifting) only accentuates her honesty and the contrast to where she came from, to where she is today.

I also really love how she shares the level of work that has gone into her success. Following her passion along with taking tons of “massive action” as Tony Robbins calls it.

She offers advice on getting a job or having a business, such as interviewing, cover letters, working with investors, creativity, and being a badass in general.

We completely recommend this book!

Awesomesauce quotes from #GirlBoss:

  • “In about eight years, I went from a broke, anarchist ‘freegan’ dead set on smashing the system to a millionaire businesswoman who today is as at home in the boardroom as she is in the dressing room.”
  • “I’m telling my story to remind you that the straight and narrow is not the only path to success. “
  • “Learn to create your own opportunities. Know that there is no finish line; fortune favors action… And prepare to have a hell of a lot of fun along the way.”
  • “What I know now is that nothing is universally boring–what’s boring to you could be totally engaging to someone else. If you’re bored and hating it, it’s a big sign that you’re most likely just in the wrong place.”
  • “If you’re frustrated because you’re not getting what you want, stop for a second;: Have you flat out asked for it? If you haven’t, stop complaining. You can’t expect the world to read your mind. You have to put it out there, and sometimes putting it out there is as simple as just saying, ‘Hey, can I have that?’”
  • “In my  book (and this is my book!) magical thinking is the alchemy that you can use to visualize and project yourself into the professional and personal life that you want… each time you make a good decision or do something once or take care of yourself; each time you show up to work and work hard and do your best at everything you can do, you’re planting seeds for a life that you can only hope will grow beyond your wildest dreams. Take care of the little things–even the little things that you hate–and treat them as promises to your own future. Soon you’ll see that fortune favors the bold who get shit done.”
  • “You have to kick people out of your head as forcefully as you’d kick someone out of your house if you didn’t want them to be there.”
  • “I’ve always been willing to throw myself at the wall and see if I stuck when it game to general life experiences, and my approach to my personal style hasn’t been any different. I was always willing to try something new. “
  • “When i’m confident in what I am wearing, it makes me feel more confident throughout the day. Granted, I could probably negotiate a deal in my pajamas, but i’m a lot more dangerous in a pair of leather pants and boots that could hurt a fool.”
  • “Bad bitches are taking over the world. When i walk into the Nasty Gal offices, it’s clear: Busting your butt isn’t just for the wallflowers anymore. We’ve arrived, and we’re killing it. There’s a chance for you, #GIRLBOSS. So take it.”

POTENTIAL ACTION STEP FROM #GIRLBOSS: SIGILS

Abstract words or symbols you create and embed with your wishes. Start by writing out a desire or goal as brief as possible (at most a short sentence). Then remove duplicate letters, then all the vowels until you have a bunch of lines that can combine into a symbol. Then place this somewhere it won’t get lost and forget about it.

The #GirlBoss challenge for you rockstars is to do something fun that you enjoy and could possibly make money from at some point… it can be a small thing on the side like it started for Sophia. Have some fun and go for it! Giddy up rockstars!

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